My birth government is Dajuan. As a youth I went by Dajuan, or Lil’ D. However throughout my time in prison I took on an alter ego of Lil’ P Nutt. During that time it was a name that was only known on my block in Compton, or in my neighborhood. But it was not known throughout Los Angeles and L.A County. Lil’ P Nutt is a name I became known for and a name I took to new heights. I’m from Compton, California. However I’m a different Compton nigga in the sense that I’ve lived up and down the West Coast. From the much slept on but still sleepless Seattle to L.A and I turned it up everywhere I went in my young G life. I could go on about the many different experiences I had in each city and turf, but the root of this story is in Compton. Me and Compton started a relationship early later than some, but earlier than the majority of the rest. The relationship we have together is a love/hate relationship. On one side I feel like Compton is a selfish, heartless bitch. She (Compton) could be a cruel lover who’ll eat you up and spit you out if you let her. On the other hand she has produced and raised some of the most unique beautiful people unlike anyone else on the face of the Earth. At 17 I caught a case for first degree murder. After being on the run for a while I was arrested. I’m still in the thick of the wild and running fast through the jungle. Unlike others who tell their story once they get out. I’m still in here in real time communicating as things go down
No, other than I’m affiliated with the Compton Pirus. 142nd street. Westside Piru.
What is your prisoner classification?
First of all with all due respect to the reader I’m rollin’ in a new era of this shit, so I don’t get caught up in all the labels of other m.f. I done seen regular m.f.’s who just call themselves inmates split a m.f.’s whole head open and I done also a m.f. who call himself a five star general and a convict pussy up and tell on the whole yard plus some. I’m just a young man striving for perfection in a grimy ass environment. Whatever works for you the reader or whoever else. As long as you respect me and how I’m coming and my push I will respect you and yours. My life is too vast and complex be labeled as one thing.
Are you able to speak on your case and what got you incarcerated?
No. First and foremost out of respect for the victim’s family as they say, the internet is written in ink. My community and the family of the victim’s is the same. As I learned as a young man the words you say can be used against you. Even when your intentions are good. In the eyes of some this interview could be erroneously seen as glorification and I would feel by putting my case out there and letting everyone know about it is far outweighed by the long term consequences (seen and unforeseen) that could come back and haunt me. However, it is public record though (the people of the State of California vs Lloyd Dajuan Joseph). I will also say that like a domino effect, an unfortunate, ill-fated and sad circumstances fell onto each other. One problem affecting the next problem so on and so forth. Not to mention how vulnerable I was amongst all the good times as well as the snakes and blatant fuckery. Despite how headstrong and determined I was to not be a victim of my circumstances.
How long have you been incarcerated?
5,247 days as of today.
I’m not speaking for everybody, I’m speaking for myself and how it is for me as a young man striving for perfection in this generation who is doing time in the California penal system. Hopefully most people can relate to what I got to say and appreciate my perspective. You have to always remember you are locked up with the best and worst criminals in the State of California. You have to know how to move. There are rules to every environment. There are clear cut rules and then there are the more lethal, but less obvious rules that like Kanye West and Jay Z said, “The pastor can’t preach and the teacher can’t teach,” you just need to know. Just like there are laws in the wild. Just like there are even customs in the highest levels of society to prevent embarrassment. Even if in your heart you don’t believe in these rules the majority of people around you will. So you need to become familiar with them in order to reach maximum success in your environment. The same is true with prison. There could be lethal consequences for ignoring these rules in prison. Especially in today’s generation. Some dudes ain’t gonna just walk up to you and knock your ass out. Remember the name of the game is to bring you down and not bring themselves down bringing you down. There could be a dude or there could be guys who could fuck over your whole life in here without lifting a finger on you. But on the other side of that coin the more familiar you become with this habitat and work it the more likely you could also fuck over a dude without laying a finger on them. A lot of people don’t like jail niggas. My attitude is I don’t want to be here either, but fuck it I am here. So I make the best out of it. There are what l call different degrees of heat. Oppression, wretchedness and gloom depending on where you at. Some level fours could be better than some level threes depending on what spot you are at. You are still in jail but there are just some places that are better to be at. Certain spots where especially if you come in young and your mind hasn’t had a chance to fully develop yet. You slowly start to feel you don’t deserve to be here on earth and that you being here must be some kind of mistake. I know for a fact that there are thousands of boys and men in California feeling like that today right now. I can still hear their souls and voices yelling in my head from when I was there. When a large population is feeling that in the spot you are at it materializes itself in other forms like hella violence, desperation and niggas snitching and everyone is affected by it. Fuck a film. No movie would be able to tell the whole story of doing time in the California penal system.
California has the largest population of people in the United States. So therefore naturally California’s population in prison is the biggest in America as well. Thousands on top of thousands of dudes from the five major population centers. Sacramento and its surrounding cities like Stockton, the Bay area San Francisco, Oakland and its surrounding cities like San Jose, Richmond, the whole Inland Empire, San Diego and its surrounding cities like Oceanside and the whole L.A County, including the valleys and the cities. We’re not just talking about Bloods, Pirus and Crips. Or even just Blacks. We talking about Hispanics, Asians, Polynesians and other races all wanting their recognition and respect. Take a minute to think about this. Fuck niggas outside the State of California or outside of the prison system trying to figure this shit out. Niggas inside the belly is still trying to figure this shit out, wrap their mind around this shit and deal with the shit they got to deal with in their personal lives. Packed into these extreme conditions and sometimes severe circumstances. You say to yourself one day I’m going to come up big and master this shit soon and look out for everybody and bless all these niggas. Show them how it’s supposed to be done and knock some of the cheat off.
What are the politics in prison like for a member of a street organization or prison organization?
It’s a gift and a curse. It’s a gift in the sense that there is strength in numbers. You can imagine all that comes with the strength in numbers if you are able to exploit or smart enough to maneuver those numbers of homies to work for you. If those same homies representing the same thing as you feel like they’re benefiting when you’re benefiting then you are winning. In the Blood and Piru card in prison you are either one of two things. No Kutt or “hooked up.” If you are hooked up you are either one of two things. BloodLine (BL) or United Blood Nation (UBN). Both of which mean you are under a constitution and obligation. The names of the two groups sound noble but don’t let that fool you anytime you are under an obligation to do something and your life is on the line if you don’t do it, it’s not good. That’s my opinion. I don’t know too much about their constitutions and paperwork because I don’t mess with it. Nor does anyone else who isn’t up under it. If you No Kutt that means you come in here bangin’ the Blood or Piru set you were from on the streets only. You are not trying to be from your hood and from something else on top of that once you get in here. Nothing more, nothing less. If you are a Crip you too are either one of two things. No Cut or a Blue Note. No one person or one group ever runs the prison or rings the yard. Drugs run the yard. Whoever holds them or holds the most of them holds the power and is king. Even if you don’t do drugs you will not escape the power of the person or the people who are holding them. Their influence will directly or indirectly magnetically pull on your whole program. This environment it’s too confined and closed in. On the streets at least you could get out of town or move to the burbs to something better and get low-key. Here you do not have that option. That could also be a curse for the person holding the power because you too are stuck in an environment or in the presence of people who don’t deal in drugs or is not getting money hating on you and possibly telling on you or sabotaging your success. The curse also rears its head when that same strength in numbers we talked about earlier make you guilty by association.
The best way I can explain it is to think about it like this for a minute. In the animal kingdom or the wild you have bees. On the surface they all look the same. It isn’t until you further investigate that you see that bees are different. You have honey bees, killer bees, bumble bees, and carpenter bees. To the untrained eye all red rags look like they’re from the “same gang.” If you take a closer look you’ll see the cultural differences between the two. The first difference starts with this. Where you’re from, what city you’re from is everything in jail. That’s how people determine how you’re going to be, how you’re going to react to things. That’s also how people relate themselves with you. For instance, if I would’ve been from Valencia or something my experience in the same jails would’ve been much different. With that being said Compton niggas stand out wherever they are in Southern California or the world. Compton, the motherland, the Mecca, the birthplace of Piru. Piru Street is in no other city but Compton. Piru’s are everywhere else in just about every other city. But there are no Bloods in Compton. None. Not one. There are only Compton Crips and Bompton Pirus. So the main difference between Bloods and Pirus in the pen got to do with boundaries. It is mainly a pure geographical difference. As well as the relatibility and commonness to those who came up like you and around you. Not only that, but Piru is one of the oldest Blood sets. And by this time it is the biggest Blood set. Try as you might you will not find another Blood set that had grown and expanded in sheer numbers and force in fame and notoriety. So Piru’s walk with a certain dignity, with their heads held high as well as an attitude of, “Fuck you. We don’t need you if you don’t want to fuck with us.” So with all that in mind a certain type of feeling, and envy comes with that swagger (for lack of a better word) from others still within the Blood card, but outside of the Piru card I’m just being real. This is undeniable. Think of how England must’ve felt when the United States blew the fuck up. Stopped paying taxes and shit. But at the end of the day it’s all good. It’s still all Love. Everybody know what it is.
I have been to the hole several times. Every spot that I was at I visited their hole. Some spots I was in their hole longer than I was on their mainline. Like when I was at Salinas Valley S.P. In the California penal system they have two separate levels of the hole. First there’s the hole (or Ad/Seg Administrative Segregation) then there’s the S.H.U. (sounds like shoe) Segregated Housing Unit. The super hole. Imagine it like this right quick because this is how it is for everybody else that call prison home every day. The mainline is our streets. Ad/Seg would be the county jail. The S.H.U would be the pen. If you get into some shit on the mainline, like stab a nigga for whatever reason you would go to Ad/Seg until your situation is worked out and your paperwork is processed for like nine months. Then you would either get kicked out to the mainline or get 18 to 24 months in the S.H.U, but you will do the rest of the 9 to 15 months in the actual S.H.U. I would say that you want to go there (the hole) as less as possible. I know sometimes you just ain’t gonna be able to help it and you gotta do what you gotta do, which is all the more reason to go as less as possible. The first time I went to the hole I was a young nigga. Like 19. I had let one of my older homies from Piru use some of my stuff (I think CDs or something small like that). So when it came time for him to give ‘em back he told me he gave them to someone to give to me and the dude transferred to another yard before they got to me. I was a little greased because they was my new CDs, but I chalked it up as a loss. The next day my other homies was telling me my older homie (I won’t use his name) had paid Crip dude with my CDs for a gambling debt he had with him days before. So the next day I see him I’m coming to get a head up fade with him period and get paid. But because of the way he did me I dope fiend his dog ass. So when I do that he falls out to the ground in the middle of the yard in front of everybody out there. He didn’t get knocked out. He just lost his footing from the element of surprise. Before he could gather his bearings tho I’m on him. Maxin’ him. Not that I’m saying I’m a super fighter. But I wasn’t losing this fight. Plus you know what they say, when you in the right you come with a bigger strength than your opponent. The police ring the alarm. Run towards us, they’re telling us both to get down, but I don’t get down. That’s where I went wrong because had I got down when they said get down I wouldn’t have went to the S.H.U. By the end of the fight we both go to the hole. But because the police didn’t see him fighting me back when they got up on us he got kicked out the hole back to the yard. I didn’t get down when the police said get down. Then they played that whole aggressor thing. In my mind it was a head up that I just won, but according to them it was a battery. So they gave me a one month S.H.U. Due to the S.H.U being so short I did it all back there in the hole (Ad/Seg). I only stayed back there for a bullshit 30 days. But still I got a block from going back to that yard and that’s where all my real niggas was at. Even tho I held my own on the other yard I went to. I was dolo. I wish I would’ve handled that differently. I wish I would’ve just pressured him, made his life in here uneasy until he paid me without laying a finger on him. At the time tho I was you, but I felt I had to send a message to him and everyone else that I ain’t taking no losses. There was no telling at the time how long I was going be in here. I felt I needed to let everyone know that if you go try me you go have a fight on ur hand. He ended up paying me while I was back there in the hole by sending out to my books. But to me he won that because of everything I went through. I took that on the chin and did it movin’. I say all that to say. Everybody know you can get away with a whole lot more shit the more you out the way. The less they know you. The less they know about you. The less paperwork they got on you and the less they have to make a move on how you move. If you go to the S.H.U. too many times. Like four or five times then they won’t let you get out of the hole. They call you a program failure. They give you an indeterminate S.H.U. It’s still dudes back there since the 80’s for shit like not cutting their dreads. While that shit may sound noble to m.f. on the streets you the one that has to do it. You start getting alone in (my Katt Williams voice). The name of the game is get as close to freedom as possible. Fuck that. So after my first visit to the S.H.U each time I visited the S.H.U just got worse. The next time I went to the S.H.U. was for a 48 month S.H.U. for battery on a corrections officer with GBI. But I beat only after three months on appeal. Not appeal through the state courts, but the California appeals system. Then I was kicked back out to the yard. Yet the situation never left my central files and they seem to remind me of it every time I go up for my annual review. The next time I went to the S.H.U. was for stabbing a nigga who tried to play me and put his hands on me when I wasn’t even looking for no problems. I was in the S.H.U. that time for 24 months. The last time I went to the S.H.U. was for a riot with the white boys (the Nazi skinhead white boys). They called they self-taking off with their knives on blacks to celebrate Hitler’s birthday. A day that is celebrated by most people as 4/20 the weed day. Even though that S.H.U. was only supposed to be for two months all the blacks that came back there with me ended up staying for nine months waiting to get transferred to another prison but the other prison wouldn’t take most of us because they was already overcrowded. So we ended up staying and getting sent back to the yard.
Do you feel that prison has made you better or worse as a person?
The thing about that is I’ll never know. I’ve been incarcerated in here since my late teens. Not from multiple bids. But from the same bid. The same case. I will most definitely say from the first day I came to jail until right now I am a 1,000 times a better person. I am sharper. I am more confident and more calculating. As well as more patient. But I don’t know if that was a natural process of growing from a boy to man. A process that I would’ve experienced anyway had I been free or grown up in the free world. I was a beautiful person before I came to the pen and I am a beautiful person now. The only difference is at first I had access to all kinds of material things to express the beauty I had within me. Now I have to find other ways to represent the beauty that I have inside me. Like creativity, intelligence, and relationships with other people.
What is the most valuable life lesson you have learned behind bars.
I’ve learned several valuable lessons each different, but just as valuable as the other. I believe these lessons are good not just for prison, but business, the streets and for organized sports or any climate or environment you are in. Number one, to know yourself because people would love to tell you who you are and be quick to think for you if you let them. Number two, don’t give up on life and life won’t give up on you. Number three, have fun because the years you spend being stressed out you will never get back. Number four, commit to something or leave it alone. Period. It’ll only cause you problems or be a burden for you later on. Number five, sometimes you have to lose in order to win again. Number six, never count anyone out, or underestimate anyone. That shit will come back and bite you in the ass. And last but not least, number seven, know that experience is a cruel teacher. So you better make your next move ur best move. Period.
I have known your brother YG Hootie (Waka Flocka’s Brick Squad) for almost ten years and he has spoken very highly of you as a person and as a reputable in the streets. With that being said what does honor and respect mean to you?
That’s a good question. I’m glad you asked me that. A textbook definition of respect would be having a set of morals and beliefs and sticking to them thangs. But it’s more than that. Respect is like a bad bitch, who once she is on your arm and everybody sees her with you the more they want to fuck with you. The more they are compelled to have confidence in you. But respect is so elusive and exclusive that she can give you all the money you can handle. But all the money you can handle cannot get you to her. Period. Respect to me is building up a solid reputation of credibility over a long period of time. A credibility and trustworthiness that has been proven and tested and is still effective enough in bringing together forces to work for you. To work for your benefit or for you and the people in your circle of influence. At its core, mankind is murderous and evil, so when you see something as virtuous and shining bright like respect and honor you hold them in high regard. Honor to me also means having a long proven solid reputation of credibility. However honor is different than her twin sister Respect in the sense that honor is recognition of you, of your excellence by others where with respect you have to first respect yourself before others will recognize and respect you. But respect is the one running shit out of the two. So you have to first catch the eye of respect before honor would even look your way and notice you.
YG Hootie introduced me to your blog http://kitesfromdapen.blogspot.com/ and I am avid reader. It brings a degree of realness and first person narrative to the California jail experience. What made you create the blog?
There are a few reasons that compelled me to create, write and push nothing but uncut no filter through the blog. First this may sound funny, or that I’m making a joke (and for the most part I am), but there is some truth to it. I began to realize that if our society was wiped out for whatever reason and future generations became blessed enough to populate and develop. They will eventually study us to get a sense of where they came from or who we were. I realized the only record of my existence of my rich experience here on earth would be written and told by people who didn’t even know me, who never knew me through court transcripts and central, and court files. That’s not even two percent of my experience. That’s not even two percent of who I am. I couldn’t leave here being defined by people who for one already had adverse intentions with regards to my life and two who never knew me or cared for me or cared to know me. The second reason I created the blog is because it’s never been done before in generations past. Do you know how many American stories are gone? How many life lessons, how many battles, how many awakenings and victories are lost? Not because they were insignificant. But because these walls of concrete and steel were designed by masterminds to snuff out significant voices and experiences. For more than 10 decades there’s been a blueprint to severe the connection between strong minds, like minds and solid minds on the streets and in the Penn. I remember when I first came to jail I was stunned by some of the shit I was seeing. It was far different than what I was seeing on TV. I used to be like if the people back on my old block or the people in my family could see this they would trip. With the advent of technology my generation doesn’t have to go through that and I am taking full advantage of that. Lastly, there’s a real connection between the streets and the Penn. More than half the people I know on the streets have someone close to them or someone they know locked up. Especially if you are black.
How are things looking on your case and when are you looking at getting out?
My shit is looking A1. I just gotta fall back from a lot of shit already going on in here.
What are your plans on release?
I plan to be somewhere boo’ed up with a Queen raising my sons and daughters in the burbs and in the cut. I’m also expanding my network and maximizing my contacts now, so anything is possible. Then I’m going to turn up of course.
Any shout outs?
GOD for being with me the whole time through this thing. Family and loved ones. YG Hootie who happened to be and I’m lucky enough to be my brother and my online partner in this internet world. #Squad. Mieisha for having my mind right and helping me focus in the light and dark days. The homie Waka Flocka and the whole Brick Squad for fucking with a nigga. Everybody over at the Larceny Media compound. All my real niggas throughout this bitch. Especially the ones that’s going to be happy to see a nigga coming (you know who you are), and everybody who been asleep on me. I hope them nightmares and restless nights.
Also check out Black T.K.’s Larceny Crime Network – Urban Pulp Crime Network http://urbanpulp.blogspot.com/